getting unstuck


This has been an interesting year. Exactly a year ago I arrived in Trieste full of optimism and excitement (and joy at seeing my fiance for the first time in two months). But I quickly fell into what I retrospectively call my ‘period of stuckness’. I kind of panicked. In London I had been building towards something in my career but I now felt that I had turned a page and suddenly had to start a new chapter. I had a blank page staring at me and I suddenly had writer’s block, except it was for my life.

Don’t get me wrong things were happening, I was planning a wedding, I was exploring my new city but I felt stuck in what my ‘career’ was going to be. You know that all important part of your ‘you’ which makes you a worthwhile person and a provider to society?

So a little while ago I received an email from Marie of Kit and Caboodle Coaching offering a coaching session. I pondered it for a while and as the month moved on I realised that this ‘gift from the universe’ was something that I could really use. A little bit of guidance and steerage to help me see my stuckness from a different viewpoint. What better way to act like I love myself then giving myself time to work out what is going on in my head.

I had met Marie a few years ago and knew already that she was super approachable and easy to talk to. I practically ran home after dropping my mom at the train station after her visit because I was so excited about our session. Obviously as I don’t live nearby we had a skype chat which we both found worked really well. We were both able to sit down with a cup of tea, pens and paper and get into a very comfortable ‘chatting zone’.

We started off the session by clarifying what I wanted to achieve by the end (something I should perhaps do more in my everyday life) and then moved on to some activities. Over our conversation, Marie was able to pull out things that I was saying and highlight what I was saying back to myself. She turned my ‘stuck period’ into a time of ‘incubation’, a time that I had needed to nest and feel safe. Plus she helped provide some clarity for me now that I was ready to start ‘writing my life’ again.

Our conversation revolved mostly about work because at the moment that is the area I feel I need to concentrate on. Sitting down and having someone asking questions, some easy but some quite hard, and helping you breakdown the answers is really useful. Having that someone be a professional who has done this for a good many years makes it even better because she isn’t your best friend nodding and agreeing with you but someone who will dig down.

The point of coaching isn’t to provide you with the answer or the paths. It is to help steer you towards your answer. I suppose I kind of knew the answers before starting, but perhaps hadn’t been thinking about the questions in the right way. Marie was like the ‘ghost of Christmas present’ helping me to see things a bit more clearly.

I came to some pretty big realisations from the conversation. Like what I need a ‘job’ to provide me with. And that the idea of a ‘career’ doesn’t really fit into my picture of what I want my life to be. And helping me figure out some next steps. Pretty impressive for 90 minutes right!?

Well do you know what is even better, Marie is being a lovely human being and offering you some special discounted sessions. So you know what, you should head over to her site and make that happen! Also you probably want to follow Marie on instagram because she is a creative genius.

kit and caboodle coaching offer

read ‘em and eat

pear and pomegranate oats

This week my brain has been very busy as I had a coaching session (which I will tell you more about next week), and have started two e-courses so a smaller link list than normal …

READ ‘EM >>>

Why you shouldn’t feel guilty about doing what you love (or about a lot of things to be honest). It doesn’t help anyone so take the guilt and make it into something positive.

How to deal with jealousy. I love how La La Lovely suggests using it to make something positive.

Want this guy in my life. I think we’d have a whale of a time (hehehehe).

Have you come across Blog Society. They are pretty cool.

EAT >>>

I have seen a lot of posts for porridge pop up and I got really excited because it has been grey here. But then it got really mild again and I decided it wasn’t porridge weather yet. So I made cold porridge instead. This might not be to everyone’s taste but I really like it. For this version I took my giant wholemeal* oats and stirred in one grated pear. Then I added oat milk to cover (because you know oat milk and oats were kind of made for each other!). Top with some pomegranate and some almonds to create texture and crunch and there you have a ‘porridge’ suitable for those days that aren’t quite cold enough for full on autumn porridge.

* In Italian wholemeal is integrale. The English definition of ‘integral’ is “necessary to make a whole complete; essential or fundamental”. I think that is an important reminder for me on what type of food to eat and why.

a broken chair in a subway

Last week I read this piece by Karmomo on non-attachment to technology. This spoke to me on several levels. Firstly just the principle of non-attachment. I really want to ‘want’ less (irony much). Maybe I am a little bit buddhist or something but I the art of enoughness is something I mostly fail at but often consider. I had never thought about this though in terms of technology. I spend so much of my life on my computer. It is a beautiful tool in that it creates connections, allows opportunities and let’s me catch up on the latest episodes of my favourite shows. But perhaps my reliance on these tools is too strong.

So this week I am practising non-attachment with my technology. That is not to say I won’t use them but will be working on using them less and seeking other means to meet my requirements of connection, entertainment and inspiration. Also rather than saying ‘no’ I am saying yes so these are five things I will do this week:

1. Make a real life inspiration board.

2. Read a book, maybe a real in your hands with pages kind instead of a reader. Where is the line with this one?

3. Take some pictures with my film camera.

4. Talk to a friend about some of the workshops that I am doing (which are all happening online!).

5. Write a letter to a friend.

How about you. What do you think about non-attachment to technology? And what ideas do you have to practise it?

read ‘em and eat

read em and eat - muesli for breakfast by mycreative

READ ‘EM >>>

I feel like I am very far from where I want to be in my ‘career’ (and mostly don’t even know where I do actually want to be) but this was an interesting piece to listen to.

An interesting short video on our social media ‘obsessed’ lives.

The lessons from being wrong.

An interesting podcast with Michael Pollan and edible food like substances.

They’re just habits and habits can be changed.

If there was a little girl in my life I would be buying her clothes here. I wish some children’s clothes would come in big people size!

Loved this differentiation between happiness and joy. I don’t suppose it matters what you call either but having an awareness that there is a deeper ‘joy’ lying under whatever you are feeling is uplifting.

All these things to do with chickpeas!

EAT >>>

Much as my instagram feed might deny it, sometimes I do just eat muesli. I like to keep it interesting though. Sometimes it is shop bought and sometimes it is a collection of cereals. I might have it with yoghurt or almond milk or oat milk. Sometimes I have a banana. This week I bought some figs. Throw on some chopped almonds and tahini.

How do you spice up your muesli?

1day12pics with a fuji instax camera

For #1day12pics on Saturday I thought I would take out the Fuji Instax camera that we had got for the wedding and have a play around.

a photo an hour in october - #1day12pics

I have to admit that they are definitely not one an hour. Things get a bit harder when you have guests staying with you. But at least there were 12 pictures. Actually our day was very much the last #1day12pics. We lazed around in the morning, went for coffee and then onto the tram and up the mountain with our guests who were staying before heading back to down for lunch and gelato. I didn’t end up taking pictures in the evening as we were running to the station to take our guests to their train and then waited at the station for my Mum to arrive, who is staying with us for the week.

I learnt a couple things about the camera while using it.

> An instax camera is not instagram. Don’t try and take pictures of your food. Especially not in anything that isn’t full on sunshine (as the flash will go off).

> The flash will go a bulk of the time. Instead of getting the golden light in the early morning I got a picture which was quite stark but still quite interesting. In fact our bedroom door looked very much like the sea when you put it on the side.

> What you will see through the frame is smaller than what the camera will capture. You have to hold your eye a little bit away from the viewfinder and I imagine the viewfinder is a little off anyway. Eventually I realised that I had to get closer in to something than I might think.

> When you close the lens (ie switch it off) it goes back to the default setting (which is ‘interior’. This means if you forget and are outside the picture will be overexposed. You can see I did this twice.

> The camera works best for bright images. Although from using it at our wedding as the ‘photo booth’ it is also great for portraits at night with the flash.

Have you got an instax? Any tips? Or looking to get one perhaps? It is a lot of fun although I don’t think I will use it quite in the same way again. Perhaps I need a specific project. Any ideas for that?

#1day12pics | october

1day12pics announcement for september

It was so utterly amazing how many people took part in #1day12pics this month. It certainly isn’t the biggest hashtag challenge in the world but it does make me very happy to see all the people join in. So the next one is this Saturday, so join in if you can.

As my own theme didn’t work too well this month I thought I would see if I could spot any themes coming from the participants. What do you think?


The Fruit Collection: The Digital Iris | Lauren Hairston | Growing Spaces | Maybush Studio | Bnourished | Poet’s Peregrinatio | Yasmin Chopin

The Black and White Collection: Changing Pages | @EmmaDaviesphoto | aperture64 | Crumbs in the Bed

I think this month I might go off instagram and take some ‘real’ photos, though I am sure I won’t be able to resist sharing a few.